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VALUES OF THE BEREAVED INDIVIDUAL
Reality Testing
When a loved one dies, we all know, intellectually, that they really have died. But people - no matter how bright or sophisticated - have strong feelings which are not logical when a powerful emotional issue is involved. One hears, "I just can't believe he's gone." And the speaker means it, to an important extent. Seeing the body as the focal point of a ritual (the funeral) is a powerful form of reality testing. Social scientists who study grief and the serious psychological problems it can cause consistently find value in viewing and the funeral. We all know instinctively how bad not seeing the body would be when a plane crashes or a bombing occurs. Great sums are spent searching for lost bodies, and we all understand why.
Establishing Significance
When bad things happen to someone, like surgery or an illness, that person needs to talk about it, to work through its significance in their lives. Ceremonies and rituals establish significance. If we were purely intellectual beings without emotions, we could fairly call funerals barbaric…and weddings, too! But people need to think back, to reminisce and reflect, almost like taking a life-inventory. Without this we can't move on, and grief becomes a more difficult, delayed process. It isn't healthy to repress memories, and at a funeral, you don't do that.
Viewing and Comfort
As medicine advances and people linger on longer, their appearances at death become increasingly disturbing. Emaciation is most common. People's faces can be lined with pain or bloated from IV fluids. We see them gasping for breath at the end. Embalming is not intended to make them look alive, but it can be very comforting to see your loved one look peaceful, not in pain, and more like you'd want to remember them. You will carry this memory-picture (or the one from the hospital room) for a long time.
Your Physical Health
The link between high stress and lowered immune system function is well established. Loss of a loved one is stressful indeed, and people undergoing grief - particularly when poorly handled and prolonged - do experience elevated rates of disease and mortality. The funeral itself may create some minor, short-run stress for the individual - but nothing compared to the stress of repressed, mismanaged, long-term grief.
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